Christmas Pain

Christmas Eve. The last day to purchase those last minute gifts. The day to get it all wrapped. The day to finish the laundry. The day to clean the house. The day to prepare any food for the next day. The day to stress over the traffic. The day to stand in long lines. THE DAY TO RUN OUT OF MONEY! It's crunch time. And every single one of us KNEW this day was coming. It's NO surprise. We have had 364 days to get ready, and yet, there are those of us that wait until the last minute. Eventually, most of us are ready to throw our hands up in the air and admit complete defeat of not getting it all done. Then there are those priceless individuals, who make me puke. You know the ones; they've been shopping since August, have ALL the loved ones on their lists checked off since the Thanksgiving weekend, tree is up and house is decorated since December 1st, cooking is done by the 22nd, and of course the laundry is done on a daily basis, so there's no catching up on Christmas Eve. Yes. Today is different for many.
We go through the anticipation of how others will react when they open their gifts, the dread of being around family that are only tolerated once a year, and the agony of eating grandma's fruit cake because we don't want to hurt her feelings. For some, loved ones are in the hospital, and laundry isn't a priority. Others are dealing with grief and want nothing to do with today, and stay in the house with curtains closed watching TCM classics. This eve, of this Holiday brings a multitude of emotions.
For me? As I sit here and write, I think about a friend whose boyfriend went missing 2 days ago. I think about 2 girlfriends who had surgery 2 days ago. I think about a friend whose son was killed 16 months ago and she's trying to grasp her 2nd Christmas without him. I think about 2 precious children whose mother was killed by a zip line and they don't have their mommy. I think about learning that a woman went to get her gall bladder removed yesterday and was told she has cancer and 6 months to live. I think about the homeless, how they don't even have a home, a house, a family. I think about the unemployed and the stress they feel by not being able to provide a Christmas to their children. I think about my family having their first Christmas without my cousin. To these people, there might not be presents, joy, happiness, turkey dinner, friends, smiles, glitter, parties, or hope. It will be a struggle for them to just get through the next 36 hours. And what a relief when December 26th arrives for some.
That's when I get on my knees and pray for each of these situations. I pray that the Creator of the Universe will pay closer attention to THEIR needs. I pray that God will USE me to show them His Love and a Hope in Him. I pray that the wonderment and awe of the birth of Jesus overrides all sadness. I pray for peace in every heart today. The peace of God which passes ALL understanding. I pray for comfort for those in grief. I pray for ALL of us to know and remember that Christmas isn't a feeling, but an event. The event of Jesus' birth. His Birthday. We recall and cherish, that what we celebrate, which is; OUR SALVATION WAS BORN~
I have been very calm this Christmas season. Our gifts are coming from the heart and not so much the checkbook. A simple Christmas, without stress. (The only stress I had was grocery shopping!) Remembering the true meaning of our December 25th's challenges us to remember what Christmas really means. Wouldn't it be great to have December 25th every day? People are kinder, softer, more patient, more tolerable, more giving with paying it forward, more compassionate with empathy. All of us, no one is exempt, have our struggles, TODAY and TOMORROW. It's up to each of us to encourage, support, accept, help, and pray for one another. It's up to each of us to call upon the name of the Lord for calm, for rescue, for rest, for assurance.
But the angel said to them, "Do not be afraid. I bring you good news of great joy that will be for all the people. Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is Christ the Lord."
"Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace to men on whom his favor rests."
Luke 2:10 & 11 and vs 14
Merry Christmas

"Who is this King of Glory"

From where I was sitting I could see a lot! For I was sitting in the middle of the chorus and could see all the people entering the sanctuary, in anticipation of having their souls fed with music and word. I was singing with the Wichita Choral Society. And so was my son Michael. This is our second year singing together, and I can't even put into words how my heart sings knowing my son is singing behind me.

As the 15 piece orchestra settled into their chairs, the chorus members were too, settling in their seats. All were attired in black and white. This  choral group of 100 had been rehearsing for 2 months and the day had arrived to perform one of Handel's masterpieces, THE MESSIAH.  Applause exploded as the director/conductor and the guest soloists entered this magnificent sanctuary. The orchestra and chorus stood up to applaud the respect that was had for this director and  principal vocal artists. As all were seated, the director took his stance on his platform, with baton up, there wasn't a sound in that hall. At the moment of command, the orchestra began playing the overture to this well loved music.

The violins were pure in every note that was played. The first soloist came to his platform and began to sing.  The tenor sang his music with precision and strength, singing each note with such clarity. The message conveyed was clearly understood. The chorus stood up at the command of the director and in joyful sound with such fullness, the sanctuary was filled with God's Glory. The second soloist took his place to sing. A voice of deep robust with each word, and each note being  sung. The Bass solo sang so powerfully holding on to every sound, making the listener feel that there was a reason, a purpose to soak in this music. As this choral piece continued, the Alto and Soprano soloists sang with such pitch, such elegance that even an untrained ear would get caught up in the angelic sound.

This piece of music not only speaks to me musically, but also with the words, taken from scripture.  I hear words of  sin, words of warning, words of comfort and words of hope. 

What an incredible privilege to sing with this Choral group and an honor to sing this beautiful and well loved music.

Saying Grace

Thanksgiving mornings consist of sleeping in, watching the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade and preparing food to bring to our family afternoon celebration. THIS morning would be different. No, I didn't sleep in. No, I didn't watch the parade. And I prepared my food the day before.

The alarm didn't even need to wake me up, for I woke up on my own at 5:15 am. I was excited to start my day. My ride picked me up promptly at 6:40 and we were on our way. Kim, Megan, Ali and I were volunteering this morning for a 5K Thanksgiving race. A race to benefit and support the Ministry of GraceMed Health Clinic. A non-profit community health clinic whose mission is to show and share the love of Jesus Christ by providing compassionate, accessible, high-quality health care for residents of south central Kansas. Many patients are uninsured or under insured.

There was a season in our family's life that we had no insurance, and GraceMed was there for our children's dental needs. We were deeply grateful for this clinic. The care, the compassion and the genuine kindness of the staff will always be remembered.

Today was the 1st Annual  Say Grace Thanksgiving  5K race!  I was assigned to stand at the starting point of the race. My duties were to encourage runners/walkers to keep going once they ran the route one full time coming through the starting point and running one more block to the finish. I encouraged 1,000 runners today!  I saw sweat, I saw weary looking people, I saw smiles, frowns, scowls. I saw determination, motivation, and yes, some discouragement. I encouraged with a clap, a holler of "way to go", "you're almost there", and  "YOU CAN DO THIS". My voice became hoarse, my hand hurt from clapping, and I had to fight the tears because of the admiration I had for these runners. I saw Rebecca, Jenny, Susan, Angie and Patti running in the race. One of many blessings this morning. So proud of these ladies and of every person there~ 

Used by God, for God~

The tables were set, the turkey was cooked along with ham, mashed potatoes, green beans, dressing and rolls. The butter was softened, as the drinks were poured. And we can't forget about the deserts! In the back of the room the clothes were washed, hung and folded, ready to wear. This sounds like an average house celebrating a holiday.

Not so...............

This was NOT your average house. This was God's house and He was hosting a grand Thanksgiving celebration for the neighborhood of Linwood. The underprivileged, the lowest of incomes, some of the poorest of poor. And I got to be one of God's servants! I was grateful!

It was the evening before Thanksgiving where my church, Asbury United Methodist, were the hands and feet of Jesus, the Body of Christ. Our second year providing a Thanksgiving meal and offering our guests an opportunity to go "shopping" without using any money. ALL the clothing and blankets were gifts.

I was asked to greet and mingle. Not a hard job for those that know me! I met John. A man in his 50's that couldn't remember much after the 1980's. Then there was Ruby, a beautiful 6 year old girl with such a sparkle in her eye. She and I hung out for a while. But what moved me the most was a family of 5. Mom, dad, and 3 children under the age of 10. I watched this family. I saw the dad get up and leave while the mom hung her head in such discouragement. Her children continued to eat. I made my way over to her and sat down next to her and began inquiring about her sadness. With tears in her eyes she said that the gas company was not going to be able to turn her gas on until Tuesday and how was she going to feed her children and it was going to turn cold. The bill was paid. But she missed their phone call earlier because she wanted to bring her children to the church to eat a meal. The gas company was now closed. First I began to pray silently, then I thought, there must be someone in this room that has authority or connections that could assist this family. I sought out 2 of our pastors, where they took over. I saw the family leave and said another prayer. I received a message from one of the pastors that informed me, one hour after my conversation with this woman, the gas was turned on!!!

My hope is that this woman, her family, and all the guests that were served last night saw Jesus. Either in a word of encouragement, a look of acceptance, a hug of love, or a plate of food.

Being called into servant hood unto the Lord IS the most rewarding calling one can EVER receive. And I believe, ALL are called~

The POKE of LIFE!!!

Today marked a special day. I became a blood donor with the American Red Cross. There were two previous attempts made to do this, but my irons levels were not high enough. So I was denied the opportunity to give. At those times, I'd leave sad, and in tears because I so badly wanted to give life to someone in need. Five days before today, I began taking iron pills, hoping that my hemoglobin levels would be high enough. AND THEY WERE!!!! Grateful, excited and ready to withstand that poke, the poke of life!!!! The phlebotomist named Karen could probably do this blindfolded, as she moved around the mobile unit, knowing exactly what tube went where and what numbers to write down. She gave me a red heart to squeeze as she put a tourniquet around my upper arm. Karen drew 2 arrows at the inside crease of the fold in my arm. Then the iodine was swabbed on the area to be poked. In one quick second, the needle was in and I was squeezing that red heart. As I laid there looking out the window, pumping my blood into the bag, I wondered who would be the recipient of this donation. Who would live one extra day, one extra month, one extra year because of someone's blood donation? Would I ever need a transfusion? Would my children or my husband? And if they did, would there be supply enough for them? My mind wandered with all of these thoughts. Then it was over. The pint bag was full, and I was finished. Only 10 minutes, and one poke, and it didn't even hurt!


When I rest my head tonight, I will thank God for the American Red Cross and the magnificent work they do. And for all the donors out there. For without donations of blood,  a life might not be able to be saved.

I'm grateful that I was able to receive the poke of life!

Not Just Another Meeting!

The meeting was scheduled to begin at 6:00pm. Never wanting to be late I arrived at 5:55pm. There before me were about 6 ladies checking in. I looked around the room and there were approximately 12 round tables set up with about 70 women sitting around chatting and getting caught up with life. There were tall women, short women, slim women, plump women. Women that were dressed up, some came in dressed down clothes. Some were groomed,  others were still learning. I found a seat along the side with other guests. Dinner was served. Buffet style, they got up and grabbed a bite to eat. As I sat there watching, taking it all in, I saw how the volunteers were caring, all with a servant's heart. I saw each woman attending treated with respect, with acceptance, and with dignity. I was getting caught up in the spirit of service. The meeting came to order with a leader that had a purpose, a mission. As she began, 3 different groups of women were being celebrated for their accomplishments. Some passed a cooking class, others passed a computer class, and the final group graduated from the program completing all the phases. There was a steady stream of women coming to the front of the room receiving the recognition they so derserved and earned. There was a warmth in my heart, a glow in my eye watching these women. Ten women had found jobs! What joy and success! After the recognition came to a close, training began. "How to stay unemployed". Different film vignettes, with leaders sharing some training tips. Informative and easy to understand, I noticed how focussed these ladies were on what they were being taught. I learned a little later that these women WANTED to be here. There are no MUSTS or anything MANDATORY after that first suit is received.  


After the meeting adjourned each table one by one got to go shopping for FREE! In an orderly fashion, they walked together into the boutique. Several of us were there to assist and help, for they could only shop for 15 minutes. And the timer was ticking. What joy! What fun! How encouraging! THIS is what it's ALL about.......


Teaching women to believe in themselves. It may begin with the gift of a suit. But that's the bait. These are transformations, beautiful transformations. Women learning that they are valued. They are created with worth. Some may have never received that encouragement. Others may have, but then forgot because of circumstances. Showing them that there is a sense of self esteem in each woman, and encouraging them to learn how to find it.

Dress for Success embraces each client that walks through their door. Accepts all unconditionally, and warmly welcomes each to strive to be their best. Thank you Dress for Success for "Dressing each woman for SUCCESS! Together with each other, differences continue to be made by enriching lives.

Does it have to be on your bucket list?

Two years ago I participated in a contest within my business. I'm very contest driven and love the process. This was a challenge that took approximately 10 weeks. On the third week we were asked to list 100 lifetime dreams, which turned into my bucket list. It wasn't difficult to start, but when I reached #79 I was finding it extremely hard to continue. I actually needed to stop and think. Ponder on the first 78. "Oh I know what #79 could be, to finish this list". And that's what I did. And I could even scratch the first accomplishment off the list, #79!!!! I took this very seriously mind you. So serious that I have already scratched 14 items off to date. There are a variety of things on my bucket list; to return to college, and I did January 2011. Lose 25 pounds, I did because of eliminating ALL processed sugar from my diet. To get a red microwave, and I received one for Christmas 2010. To be on a regular workout, and I am with ballet classes twice a week. To be a singer at Rally for Premier Designs, and I was July 2011. There are many more yet to be accomplished. But the one thing that IS NOT on my bucket list is being involved in a Beauty Pageant.  And I am. My dear friend Kim, who is the title holder for MRS. USA, All World Beauties, encouraged me to consider sending my application in to compete in the MRS. Kansas pageant. This threw me completely off guard. It wasn't on my bucket list. Thought maybe, I'm too old. And why? Why would I want to do this? It took 6 weeks of prayer, thought and dialogue with my husband. Then one day, I was on the phone with 2 different girlfriends who were both struggling with life, with kids, with marriage with finances, you name it. I listened, then I encouraged, motivated, encouraged more, listened to the sobs, shared like experiences and how I got through and told them both that I believed in them and knew they would overcome. That's when it hit me........I want to make a difference in every woman that I meet. I want each one to feel the encouragement and support that I too once needed so badly. I sent in my application just under the deadline and anxiously waited for a reply. The reply came and I was chosen to represent this awesome community I live in, Wichita, Kansas. I was thrilled beyond belief. ( the MRS. category does not require a preliminary competition). Because of my passion for public speaking and my desire to encourage, my hope is that this opportunity will open doors to accomplish what I am setting out to do, to reach more women.


Dress for Success has become my platform. This is a non-profit organization that helps low-income women make tailored transitions into the workforce. The mission of Dress for Success is to promote the economic independence of disadvantaged women by providing professional attire, a network of support and the career development tools to help women thrive in work and in life. BINGO! I found a match for my passion! 


Since accepting my title as MRS. Wichita All World Beauties, I have added this to my bucket list with different words. To celebrate women of all walks of life, past, present and future.

                                  October 29, 2011 Dress for Success "Boo & Brew" Fundraiser

                                                                 
                                                                          Below
  My first public appearance as MRS. Wichita, All World Beauties, interviewed on ABC KAKE 10

And now, she's a mother~

She was 8 months old when I met her. Bright eyed, pretty and truly a joy! The first "baby" that I had opportunity to develop a relationship with. We played ball together rolling it back and forth. There was a connection in that meeting. An unexplainable immediate bond that happened. Through the years that followed, our relationship grew, finding new depths of unconditional love that only an Aunt and a Neice could share. Spending a lot of "girl time" together, getting our nails done, shopping sprees, and good old time giggling, brought us to another level of our relationship. She was 20 years old when she came to live with us. I was absolutely thrilled beyond words. Our history consisted of so much! Our bonding continued to strengthen and our relationship never stopped growing into what only God would want. And I was so blessed to have her with me for a while. The challenges and obstacles she faced were gigantic!. But with determination, grace and a strong will and desire to succeed, nothing got in her way to follow her dreams. And that she did, followed her dreams and made them happen.
Now she's a mother. A woman with a child. A little boy that God has entrusted her with to love, to nurtue, to raise with Mike, the man that loves her and continues to embrace this relationship that brings so much joy into his life. A mother that will laugh, cry, worry, play ball with. A mother that will care more than anything that she could imagine. A mother that will fall in love with a baby over and over again. A mother that will feel hurt and angry. A mother that will appreciate sleep. Yes, my precious neice is now a mother.
As our relationship continues to grow, it will now evolve into yet again, another level. Now we are both moms. We will learn to appreciate the struggles that we both will go through as moms. And we will rejoice together at each feat our children accomplish. Our relationship will deepen, will take on a newness without leaving the history we have created.
I am so grateful to have this friendship with my neice Ashley. A 25 year relationship that has never disappointed. I look forward to the next 25 years and watching our relationship continue to grow.
Ashley, I love you so much and I am so proud of the woman that you have become. You are the closest thing to a daughter that I have ever had and I cherish that! As you have now entered the world of motherhood, you will learn love in a brand new way. And because love comes so easy to you, I have no doubt that your son Kynrik, will learn that same love and will be a blessing to many others, as you have been a blessing to me.
Love~
Auntie Kathy

You NEVER get a second chance to make a FIRST impression!

"Do not forget to entertain strangers, for by doing so some people have entertained angels without knowing it" Hebrews 13:12

Whether you're representing your church, your place of employment, your business, or yourself, that first impression to others is critical. Ask yourself, when I meet someone for the first time, what is it that I remember most? What is it about that person I'm drawn to? What is it about that first meeting that would not want me to schedule another? Remember, they are asking themselves that same question about you!

Are you welcoming and accepting? Do you have good eye contact? Are you dressed appropriately? Is your handshake one of confidence, firmness without gripping? Minor things to some, but crucial to be remembered. What people want the most is genuine acceptance. We all do. When making that first impression are you sincere, honst, and "real"?

Take for example, a job interview. That first impression on both sides of the meeting could very likely determine whether that job opening will be filled. First and foremost the important thing is to be yourself! A lot of times our anxieties and nervousness causes us to put that invisible wall up which will not allow us to be who we really are, stealing the opportunity to make a lasting impression. It's ok to be nervous, as long as you allow yourself to be nervous. It's when we don't lean into it that we become phony.

When visiting a new church, people are always looking for that extended hand, that greeting, that acceptance. Is your church one that people want to keep coming back to? Are there people at the door saying good morning? Are you a church of hospitality? Would you want to return? If the numbers of people are declining in your church attendance, the reason might not be coming from the pulpit, but from the front door. Taking an inventory might be in order.

This also includes our facebooks, twitters, and any other social media outlet. First impressions are being made every time our sites are being visited. Especially by people we have never personally met. Are your posts really reflecting who you are or who you want people to think you are? If you met someone personally that you had never met before, but met through facebook, would you be the same person on the street as you are beind your computer screen? Hmm, I wonder how many can actually say they walk the talk.

In closing, you never know who you are going to meet for the first time on a day to day basis. Treat everyone with kindness, acceptance and with a sense of serving. And that works on both sides of the first impression.

The Bond with Ballet!!!

I looked at the clock and it said 5:03 am. I knew the alarm was set for 6:30 and wondered why was I awake so early? Lying in bed, I began stretching my legs feeling the pain from yesterday's ballet class. I was quickly reminded that I am not 15 anymore, but 53! Continuing to stretch, just to be able to get out of bed, a gentle prompting came over me to put into words what my heart has been singing for the past two weeks, in spite of the groaning my muscles have been expressing.

I was merely 5 years old when I first entered a ballet studio. I really don't remember much of that time except what I was told. "Honey, you were full of so much energy (ha! that's a nice way of saying I was HYPER), that mommy needs a break from this, energy", saith my mom! Hence a life began. A place of refuge, a place of acceptance, a place of challenge, and a place of sweet reward. Little did I know then, just how much ballet would be in my blood, my mind, my heart, my soul. Progressing into my art, came a lot of dedication and determination. Taking classes all through high school and performing with several ballet companies, I began to realize that this is all I know! This is all I wanted to know! Even my high school peers knew me as the "Ballerina". I would do anything to dance; I cleaned the ballet studios in order to pay for my classes, I sacrificed the latest fashion to be able to have my point shoes, I chose ballet over cheerleading. At the age of 21, I moved to NYC and studied under some very prominent names; Melissa Hayden, David Howard, Joffrey. Fear of success brought me to the next chapter of my life..........I walked away from the only thing I knew and loved, and stopped! Quit! Never looked back, until I was 30 years old. Upon returning home, to the comfort of my family, I was able to reconnect and reconcile with my love, dance! Re-entering the studio at that time was like putting on an old shoe. However, aging to 30, it was obvious that my body and my feet were not able to do what it once did. So I settled for other aspects of this art, doing simple things like ACT I in Nutcracker and being involved as much as I could. Getting married at 34 and having children at 36 and 39, Ballet was no longer a priority. At age 39, my mother died. My mom died, My best friend died. My encourager died. and at that time, BALLET DIED~That was 14 years ago. Re-entering the college world in January 2011 with my major being performing arts, I took the risk and registered for BALLET I this semester. I have now taken 4 classes. The joy in my heart cannot be expressed in words. This love that has been dormant in my soul for 14 years has been resurrected beyond expectation. The muscles remember, the alignment is still there, the poise exists, and the willingness to do the best I can has never left me. Same old shoes, same ballet bar, same love! June, Jill, Nancy, Nathalie, Barbara Jean,and now Denise, from the bottom of my heart I am so grateful to you for all that you have given to me in the world of dance. I thank my mom! For her sacrificial giving, her support, her pride, and the words that resonate within my heart, "YOU CAN DO THIS"